The most frightened Michael Hendry has been during his ongoing treatment for leukaemia was when he looked at himself in his bathroom mirror after his first, six-week round of chemotherapy. It was like looking at a ghost.
“I’d lost 15 kilograms … you could see my ribs, my collarbone. My shoulders had squared up. My colour was grey.
“There were mirrors in the hospital but it's not until you get somewhere with some context that it hits you.
"And when I got home and saw myself for the first time, it scared the shit out of me,” Hendry told Golf Australia magazine.
The 44-year-old made a promise to himself there and then: however bad he was feeling, he’d force himself to work out. He and wife Tara engaged a personal trainer, and every other day Hendry did what he could.
Sometimes that wasn't much.
While the stays in hospital decreased in duration, the volume of chemotherapy went up. Some days he’d be so weak he’d have to catch his breath after walking up stairs. There were days he had to force himself to get out of bed to go to the bathroom.
“And I’m not a procrastinator. I'm someone who'll do things. So to be in bed and spend 20 minutes telling myself to get out of bed to go to the bathroom ... something wasn't right.
"But I really, mentally forced myself to work hard. Doing that meant the road back was going to be a lot shorter,” Hendry said.
Such mental strength bore fruit at Royal Queensland on Saturday when Hendry stormed into the top-10 of the Australian PGA Championship with a brilliant 64.
Teeing off in the third group at 06:26, Hendry took advantage of relatively benign conditions and carded seven birdies. Not bad considering he spent most of Friday thinking he’d miss the cut.
“I played a bit scrappy yesterday and it still doesn’t feel like it’s flowing that well,” Hendry said. “But that’s golf, isn’t it. One day you're not quite there and a bad bounce you end up in a worse spot.
“Then, like today, you can make a putt and get some momentum and shoot a great score, and it doesn’t feel all that different.”
Hendry is often asked if his “perspective” to golf has changed since his diagnosis, treatment and remission. He said the game remains "really important" because it's how he pays his bills, but then it's "also not important".
“So it's a funny one to answer. Everyone thinks, oh you can’t worried about not scoring well.
“But I am, because I still want to do well.
"My way of beating cancer is to do it on the golf course. There's a chance I might not be able to do it and live to the age that I would without it, so my way of beating it is to go out and perform on the golf course.
“I've still got desires to do well and that puts a bit of pressure on me. So I'm still trying my hardest and I still struggle."
If nothing else, Hendry looks fit. There’s a hardness about the 44-year-old and he looks like the athlete. He looks strong.
He said his competitive streak remains strong, also.
“When I get on the first tee I’m focused on wanting to do well. And I still get frustrated after hitting a bad shot.
“But I think I let them go a bit quicker. I’ve found myself hitting bad shots and then being very happy to have a laugh ten seconds later … previously it might take me a couple of minutes.
"I think I'm just letting stuff go a lot better, which can’t be a bad thing."
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